Soli Deo Gloria
Type: (Family Blog) A post Serious.Life picked to share with you (unedited from the blog): Purpose And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28 I am having such a difficult time trying to decide how to write this post. The appointment yesterday was interesting. The neurologist hasn’t changed his bedside manner or view of himself in the last 4 months, but praise the Lord, Moody and I are completely in a different place! We got to the office and unfortunately Abe was fussy as he had missed his nap. My pride kicked in immediately as I wanted my boy to "perform, show off his skills, wow this man!" Why did I care? Pride. Sin. He was really tight as he often is when he gets tired, and I just knew the Dr. wouldn’t see all of the progress that we see on a daily basis. Ugly, I know. Moody and I waited in the office for awhile for the Dr. to come in and literally 10 seconds after he entered the room, Abe fell fast asleep. HE WAS OUT!!!!! The first thing the Dr. asked us was if we were ever contacted about Abe’s MRI. He couldn’t see in his notes that he had ever talked to us about the results. Yes, we have been sitting by the phone every day for the past 4 months hoping that somehow, someway this will be the day that someone calls to let us know how the image of our sons brain looks!! PLEASE. Moody simply told him that a good friend goes to church with one of Drs. partners and he called us 30 minutes after the MRI. :) I think Moody enjoyed it actually. "You must have the inside then" was his response.
He then continued on with this......."oh, I think it is coming back to me, you had some village dr tell you he was o.k right and I think I made you (pointing to me) cry!" Ding, ding, ding, we have a winner!!! He did make me cry, YES he did. Something about "I’m sure the MRI will reveal significant brain damage and I’m not sure if he will ever walk or talk" made me cry. I guess I’m a softie that way. I had to kick Moody’s foot because I was afraid that he just might come unglued at that point. He asked us if we wanted to all go out in the hall and view the scan together. (side note, Abe was born in a hospital in Addis, seen by a good Dr. in Ethiopia, our pediatrician and an International Adoption specialist once we returned and none of them suspected anything other than typical developmental delay--so the village Dr. part really stung)
Ok, truth. I haven’t seen the image. I just couldn’t ever see a reason to have that picture in my head. I simply wanted to see Abe and the miraculous works the Lord was doing in his brain and not some big, black hole. I read the report, I knew that it would look completely abnormal, that it wouldn’t offer me any hope and so we declined to go look with him. Surprisingly, he was pleased with this answer. He agreed that the image would do nothing to encourage, so he ran out of the room to refresh his own memory.
He entered the room with "that was impressive." I had no idea what in the world he meant by that one, so I asked. He said that Abe is impressive, he would never imagine that Abe (remember,perfectly sleeping baby) would be the child to go with that scan. I guess he was going off of our testimony of Abe’s progress. He again used the words, "significant abnormal brain development" and explained things a little more in detail.
This was helpful honestly as it cleared up several questions that we have had. Abe’s injury is not what you typically see in an inuterine stroke. Typically you will see a hemi (one side affected) or an isolated portion of the brain injured. Abe’s scan is just much worse than either of those two. He is missing both the left and right frontal lobes and a small sliver of brain that runs down his right side. This completely explains why his left side has been more involved than his right. Because it isn’t "typical", he would like Abe to visit a hematologist for a complete stroke work up. He thinks it will show that it was indeed vascular in nature or possibly it just never formed correctly very early in his development. Either way, we need to be sure that he isn’t at risk for a future stroke.
He also thinks Abe would be benefit from his spasticity clinic. He is an expert in the field and we feel good about this as another option for Abe’s therapy. Maybe this alone is the reason that we first stepped foot in his office. I think time will tell on that one. We plan to schedule and appointment with the clinic and see if it is a good fit.
We left the office so very different than we did last time. I will never forget walking outside last time and watching the cars zip by and thinking "how are you going on with your life people, don’t you know that my world just turned upside down!!!" I realize now just how egotistical that thinking is- but at the time, it is exactly how I felt. Yesterday, we walked out with our precious boy, filled with hope. Hope that only the Lord can bring, hope that He is in control, hope that Abe is progressing, hope that he will continue to progress, and hope in a Father that loves us beyond what we can ever imagine! HOPE.
As Moody was putting the kids to bed last night, they prayed for Dr. A. They prayed that the Lord would reveal Himself to him through Abe. That he would see something miraculous taking place before his eyes, something that he has to acknowledge isn’t within the realm of modern medicine and desire to know more. Will you join me in praying for him? I have to say that this is clear evidence of a work the Lord has done in my heart. I can honestly say that I so clearly see the Lord’s hand in bringing us to that office. He works all things for our good.
Thank you for the many texts and emails that I received yesterday. They are such an encouragement to all of us. You are loved and appreciated. :) ~
